The U.S. military acknowledged that a suspected Chinese spy balloon is hovering over Montana on Wednesday, but have neglected to shoot it out of the sky, and the internet has some thoughts.
“Biden won’t allow the Air Force to shoot down the Chinese spy satellite floating over America’s nuclear arsenal,” someone tweeted.
“The president is worried debris might land on Kevin Costner cancelling his favorite show.”
Time reported that the balloon was flying higher than commercial air, but lower than space, and “does not present a military or physical threat to people on the ground,” on Wednesday.
Biden was briefed on the situation and the Pentagon considered bringing the balloon down over the Big Sky state, but opted not to endanger people on the ground with falling debris.
“We wanted to make sure…to empty out the airspace around that potential area,” a spokesperson reported.
“But even with those protective measures taken—and it was the judgment of our military commanders—that didn’t drive the risk down low enough, so we didn’t take the shot.”
The internet has been less than pleased with the response. “What would the Chinese do if we flew a US Spy balloon over Chinese sovereign territory? #boom,” wrote Roger Stone.
“I feel that, as a sovereign government, you can probably ignore the Chinese spy balloon as long as no one notices it,” one person pointed out.
“But the minute this info becomes public, you need to send Tom Cruise up there to blow it up with a nuclear weapon and then piss on the crash site.”
“I have questions about the Chinese spy balloon… Are we waiting to know it’s preferred pronouns before we address it?” Someone questioned.
“Can we not shoot it down because we sent all our equipment and ammo to Ukraine? How did it get into our airspace to begin with? Oh wait.. we have open borders.”
Fox News host Jesse Watters reported that the balloon did cross over an open border… Canada’s.
“Apparently the spy balloon flew over Alaska and then entered U.S. airspace through Canada,” he remarked.
“Some ally the Canadians are, they didn’t even give us a heads up,” Watters teed up. “Trudeau’s probably too worried about the truckers.”
“Justin Trudeau allowed Chinese military assets to invade Canadian airspace today. He wants you to think that the real threat is Tucker Carlson,” someone tweeted. “The real threat is Trudeau’s friends in China.”
CNN tried to downplay the the fact that the Pentagon has been tracking the balloon for several days without action.
“This seems a reasonable position since Chinese surveillance satellites with a far greater capacity for espionage are known to hover in space over the US,” the network wrote in an article.
“It seems far less likely this is a deliberate provocation since there’s reason to think China wants to turn down the heat too,” the left-wing outlet reported. “Perhaps Beijing lost control of its balloon.”
Republican politicians are less inclined to deemphasize the foreign invasion of United States’ airspace.
“Why won’t Biden shoot down the Chinese spy balloon that is currently flying over the United States? The Chinese Communist Party is a threat to our existence,” wrote Sen. Marsha Blackburn (R-TN).
“China’s brazen disregard for US sovereignty is a destabilizing action that must be addressed and President Biden cannot be silent,” said House Republican Speaker Kevin McCarthy.
“Biden should shoot down the Chinese spy balloon immediately. President Trump would have never tolerated this,” added Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA).
“President Trump would have never tolerated many things happening to America.”
“Biden is the weakest president in American history, and the Chinese sent a spy balloon to prove it,” someone acknowledged.
“We’re just reporting on it like ‘yup, that’s a spy balloon,'” said another. “No wonder they don’t respect us. We’re too lazy to even protect our own assets.”
Still plenty of people had theories about the reason the balloon is in our airspace and why the government refuses to blow it out of the sky.
“The Chinese spy balloon is releasing Covid-20,” someone posited.
“People screaming for the military to shoot down the Chinese spy balloon. Folks you know we can’t do that,” another recognized.
“If we do Biden, Swalwell, Feinstein and McConnell will be in serious trouble with the Chinese.”
“The Whitehouse has dismissed the Chinese high altitude spy balloon,” a parody account tweeted.
“It is now confirmed that Eric Swalwell has taken Fang Fang on a Hot Air Ballon date.”
“I would like to apologize for attacking Joe Biden and accusing him of not wanting to shoot down the Chinese Balloon,” wrote Terrence K. Williams.
“I forgot Obama is actually running this country behind closed doors. OBAMA SHOOT THE BALLOON.”
If the U.S. government doesn’t want to do it, there are plenty of people who think they can take out the spy balloon on their own.
“PLEASE let the Chinese spy balloon fly over Tennessee! One well placed 7mm Mag round, and we’ll be hanging that sucker on the living room wall,” boasted conservative country singer John Rich.
“The Chinese Spy Balloon would have been shot down by now if it was flying over Texas,” said one proud Texan.
“I bet the Chinese spy balloon isn’t brave enough to fly over Alabama,” another added.
One Montana journalists predicted what local news reports in Montana will look like on Friday morning.
“If years of writing a police blotter in Montana has taught me anything it’s that tomorrow we’ll be reading this,” he posted.
“5:32 p.m. A Billings man tried to shoot down the Chinese spy balloon with his shotgun. 6:21 p.m. Another man took a crack at the balloon.”